I actually find it very sad that people laughed at you. I've been telling almost all of my friends, close or distant, during the past 5 years that I would do LL someday. Last week I met a very old friend after 3 years, and he told me that he was afraid that I had done LL, and would meet him wobbling, unable to walk. Then I told him the big news - only 1 week left for surgery!
The reaction from relatives is frustrating though. It makes me utterly angry. I'm fed up with hearing "Why don't you love yourself?", a foolish assumption based on thinking that insecurity and self-hatred has led me the decision to do LL. On the contrary, I believe that I am doing good for myself. I would rather be judged about a decision I made myself, than a condition (being short) that I had no say upon. I won't torture myself with living the life of a short man. I did that for 22 years, I've had enough of the bad quality of life. True, maybe I should take more things for granted. But I'd rather have my family back me up 100% about this decision than keep whining about it and still hoping me to change my mind. I mean, it's a sad sight. It's already a hard decision, and I made it 5 years ago. My aunt still asks me "If I'm excited". Why should I be? I'm tired, fed up, frustrated of the life I've lived. I'll leave the excitement part post-op.
"Be at peace with yourself." Ha. What a gem. Be at peace with myself and lie to myself? I'm way too honest to do that. It's a disappointing attitude. Not problem solving, but further problem-making. Building barriers with fear. Acceptance of inadequacy. Typical bull Eastern way of thinking. God I miss the West.
